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Columns

November 12, 2013

Obama: 'Zero Hero' is here

The perfect time to address disappointment is go to never and wait. Most of us would rather speak of inadvertent bowel movements in public. Especially when the person you’re bummed with is a loved one. Whatever it takes not to look them in the eye: going so far as to hold your hands over your ears making woo-woo noises. Folks have been known to sleep in the garage.

It’s the Democrats sleeping in the garage these days, because they cannot make eye contact with the leader of their own party. The liberal exodus off the presidential bandwagon has become so monumental, we’re approaching klaxon fire-drill evacuation levels. AAUUUGUAH!

“Not really sure.” “Didn’t know.” “So sorry.” The last couple months witnessed a bout of administration policy blunders that made the rounds of disastrous to calamitous with a side trip to fiasco. To his compatriots, the phrase Barack Obama Leadership Skills, is similar to saying Paula Deen Apollo Theater bookings.

The situation has pretty much distilled down into three camps. The portion of the party a little to the left of Fidel that will never be happy until Barry twitches his nose and world peace and an end to planetary hunger simultaneously fall out. The centrists who don’t quite understand what all the hubbub is about or why everyone is so mad at the president. After all, he hasn’t done anything. And Joe Biden.

Not all the fault should be laid at the president’s feet. He was hailed by progressives as a savior who would part the heavens and cause yoga pants to rain down on them like snowflakes. Which was understandable, because after all, he was, ostensibly a Democrat, and following eight years of George W. Bush, Cardinal Richelieu would have seemed progressive.

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